http://www.financialdating.com/love-and-money-is-talking-about-money-in-your-marriage-like-trying-to-blend-oil-and-water/ When you begin to consistently ask what your spouses positive intention is in the “heat of the moment” you’ll be able to immediately see things from your partner’s perspective and have empathy for them – instead of becoming defensive and reacting to the way they are behaving or communicating their message