Do you believe in soul mates? How about love at first sight? Do you think you’re destined to find that one-in-six-billion diamond in the rough or is happily-ever-after a matter of compromise, hard work and compatibility? You may think you’ve selected your paramour based on similar interests or that witty sense of humor, but science suggests that there are biological forces at play as well. Sexual chemistry involves a balance of both behavioral and chemical elements and we still have lots to learn about their complex interplay. The following summarizes some of the most interesting research findings that help to explain the mystery of sexual chemistry.
Which Personality Type Are You?
If the success of algorithm-based dating sites like E-Harmony and Chemistry.com is any indication of popular belief, it would seem that there is an overwhelming consensus that happily-ever-after is firmly rooted in personality-based matching. Dr. Helen Fisher, the anthropologist behind the Chemistry.com brand divides daters into four personality styles or temperament dimensions that shape our thoughts and behaviours:
Explorers are drawn to risk, optimism, creativity and impulsivness.
Builders are more cautious, calm, traditional and persistent.
Directors are analytical, decisive and sometimes aggressive.
Negotiators are imaginative, compassionate, intuitive and idealistic.
Though none of us falls exclusively into a distinct category, one’s primary style is based on the body’s reactions to dopamine, serotonin, testosterone and estrogen. Accordingly, chemistry depends on how your personality matches or conflicts with a potential partner’s and is rooted in the interaction between behaviour and hormonal response.
How Our Hormones Play A Role
Hormonal activity underlies sexual attraction, desire and arousal as a flurry of chemicals react to external stimuli. It only makes sense, therefore, that hormones play a significant role in determining sexual chemistry. Estrogen and testosterone tend to take centre-stage as pheromones offer a subconscious whiff of fertility resulting in lustful attraction. Sexual chemistry, however, is further developed as dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin promote attraction, and oxytocin and vasopressin promote bonding with a partner.
If we apply Fisher’s model of personality styles to the role of hormones in determining sexual chemistry, we see more specific ways in which biology may determine behavior and partner selection: For example, Explorers tend to be curious, energetic and prone to boredom. Fisher links these elements to variations in dopamine that lead to a desire for novelty, excitement and adventure.
