I’m like, any time it’s set to board, I want to be here.”
Airlines have experimented with everything, including back-to-front boarding, window-seats-before-aisle-seats boarding,
and what some people call “chaos boarding,” where passengers basically rush the gate en masse.
“I’m going to give them my bag,” one woman says, “because I don’t want to be dragged off the airplane.”
• United Flight 2049, Denver to Houston, 3:10 p.m.
Having successfully completed the latest task in the growing category of “Things Airline Employees Used to Do” — printing out
and affixing my own bag-routing tag — I proceed to security.
Airline executives have come to realize that they can do almost what they like in economy class, offering basic service — a seat, basically — at cut-rate prices
and then charging for add-ons like legroom, checked bags and the right to choose a seat.
• Delta Flight 1106, San Francisco to Salt Lake City, 10:34 a.m.
• Delta Flight 2926, Salt Lake City to Denver, 3:20 p.m.
Half of America is furious at the other half, unable to agree on even previously uncontroversial topics like the weather.
