Clearly something other than food was on Andrew Davidson's dirty mind when he started screaming about penises and began dry-humping a refreshments trolley on ScotRail train last summer.
Court proceedings reveal Davidson was high aboard a train traveling from Aberdeen to Glasgow after taking a cocktail of legal intoxicants in July of 2013.
Passengers became worried on noticing Davidson's weird behaviour. In a horny rage frenzy tried to sit on a female passenger's lap. He then grabbed the train steward's arm and tried to french kiss her. The steward broke free and escaped the cabin at the next stop.
Davidson then mounted the unattended drinks trolley and performed a simulated sex act.
His lawyer described the obscene outburst thus: "It is something that has never happened before and is unlikely to ever happen again."
The court placed him on community payback and ordered him to carry out 100 hours unpaid work. Not a bad deal.
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