In the city of Vladivostok
lived a KGB agent named Kok.
He would first count to ten
put his shirt on and then,
with great care put one foot in each sock.
In the Kremlin the boss is called Putin.
When he found his own party boss rootin'
he said communists are
not at all like the Czar,
there is nothing in life, highfallutin'.
Down in Capetown there lived a recluse
he was six foot and had a short fuse.
When the lion got out
he was nursing his gout.
And the lion ate both of his shoes.
In the Bunker said bride Eva Braun,
'Darling could you please button my gown? '
Said the Fuehrer 'We Prussians
wear no gown for those Russians',
and he tore down her gown with a frown.
In the midst of a country's election
stood the candidate, deep in reflection.
When he thought he could win
he put on a big grin
then he suffered a whopping erection.
From the handsome and well-tended cave
which is home to the bold and the brave,
fell two drops to the ground
though with nary a sound;
it was really all caused by the shave.
When Dean Martin went for his last tipple
there was wind on the sea and a ripple,
through the booze deep in thought
but his eye soon was caught
by the sight of a Hollywood nipple.
Johnny Mathis was known for a phobia.
When he went to the country of Trobia,
he was drawn to a man
in the town's public can.
And the man said, 'remove, please your robe-ya? '
A black fellow by name of Obama,
in cahoots with the Muslim Osama,
was sent money and guns
and a few thousand sons.
But Obama just wanted his Mama.
Herbert Nehrlich
http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/pre-election-limericks/
