I often wonder will I be one of the lucky ones
To be given a new reprieve on life...
Given a second chance to appreciate
All the things in life I have taken for granted.
Suicidal thoughts and attempts thru out the years
When I should have held fast to all that is dear to me
The beauty that I was too selfish to acknowledge...
I want to live life to its fullest, watch my kids grow
Walk in the rain, play in the sun...
I know we all must go sometime but please, please
Not this soon... not with cancer
The suffering of endings and new beginnings.
I weep, but not in horrible pain, not in the pain and fear of
Being abandoned, left alone, sweltering in my own mind’s rhetoric.
My tears now are of life and lives lived and unlived.
Songs that have not yet been sung, I weep in joy,
I dance among the stars, I long for the beauty of the
waves of the ocean to return to me.
Pulsing over and over me in ecstatic abandon.
My blood remembering the feel of life;
the Heavens exploding above my Head.
The stars shooting, falling for Just us.
31.December 2007
Mary Wismer
http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/cancer-ii/
