You know that popular exercise machine
called the “Stairmaster? ” Well, I have a money-
making idea for motivating out-of-shape religious
people to start working out. We could invent a
machine and call it the “Christ-master.” It could
have a little speaker system with a voice that
screams things at you, like “Onward Christian
soldier! ” or “Move thy ass! ” And it could have a
little whip mechanism that flagellates you if you
slow down too much. We could have a “Mecca-
master” model for Moslems, and when you order
the Zen Buddhist model, all you’d receive is an
empty box. You crawl inside it and then you
BECOME the Zen master.
Professor Poetry Hound
http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/sweatin-to-the-scripture/
