There once was a lady named Kane
she lived in Northcumberland Lane
she was a bit fat
and regrettably flat
it was driving her somewhat insane.
So she constantly went and attacked
those who had what she obviously lacked
and whenever she dressed
she was praying for breasts,
made with the old devil a pact.
Then one day in the middle of Spring
she was scratching her scapular wing
when she noticed a swelling
and hot tears began welling
and her titties began to sing.
Well the devil had kept his word
had corrected where God must have erred
within fourteen hours
she was getting flowers
and Uriah was gawking, my word.
Herbert Nehrlich
http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/about-breasts-with-apologies/