The suffering of my youth
reawakens and reappears.
I need to transcend it.
I hope my mawkishness will
get me past it...
The pain I feel
is like flames of burning walls
that need to be replenished
in the sea of life,
Because I exist with no goal
or course of action
and just pain
heckling my doomed life...
It's not easy deteriorating,
being depressed and shuffling moods,
I never know what to expect
from even myself...
I have an array of moods
and feelings,
sometimes a new one each day...
There's no consistency to depth of thought...
It manipulates me...I can't contain it
I just hope and pray
for balance and adjustment,
with even tempered structure
edged with trust...
Jeanne Fiedler
http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/the-rising-tides-2/
