I give so willingly, of myself
That I might steer you
to self assurance
All the while searching for air
To fill my deflated lungs...
And left hungry
for mere morsels of appreciation,
Not to boost my ego
But to at very least,
Know, that you know...
I care enough....for now...
I sacrifice time and temper,
Offering my shoulders
that you may unburden YOUR load
Unto MY already hunched back...
Heavy, from the weight of what I bear
If, but on the back burner...as usual...
I am spread thin,
Like honey on bread
Starving for a glimpse to see you
Take a chance,
To be present...in your own life....
It is not enough to ask for help
If you don't see the value of my time...
And in your casual disconnecting way
Leave your bundled broken pieces,
at my door...
I cannot be the crutch
You readily grasp
Time after time...
When I know, with certainty,
You are capable of walking, alone.
Hours fade,
like summer's honeysuckle blooms
And the sweetness falls from the vine...
Yet you, with apparent indifference,
Fail to recognize that I might reach
My boiling point
Much hotter and higher,
Than that of a solar flare...
It might appear I've time to kill,
But your 'come what may- look away' attitude
Is robbing my readiness and resilience
Almost to the point
Of feeling 'what's the point'...
Haven't you heard anything I have said? ? ? ?
The value of my time
Is that I have time,
for those I love,
Those in need of a sympathetic
Outstretched hand...
Not looking for a hand out,
Or a pat on their back...
Which I myself rarely receive...
But that someone stands for their own convictions
Deciding to grab hold of the reins
And gallop, full stride...
That I might see them,
independent..
Leaving me to myself,
To spend my time, in worth and wellness.
For this true, the value of MY time
Susan Lacovara
http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/the-value-of-my-time/
