In a video report referencing a case of ball kicking uploaded to YouTube on Sunday, a reporter from Canada's Global network news laments, "If a city is judged by the way it treats its most vulnerable citizens, the video evidence is clear, Vancouver has a long way to go." That is his attempt to wrap a bitter coating around a sweet kick to the balls. The story has captivated television news in Vancouver, which apparently doesn't have enough wacky happenings, giving ball kick hungry television watchers what they crave.
Unfortunately, it is considered unethical or substandard for a network to broadcast an epic ball kicking just because it's funny. The trick then is to make it into news by faking empathy with the guy getting his ball kicked (actually, empathy with the guy getting his balls kicked is the secret to the success of ball kicking videos. It's what makes you wince). Then, while lamenting the social ill that has beset the youth of British Columbia, the network replays the footage of the ball kicking many many times. They even invited the guy who uploaded the video to comment. "Well, people wouldn't have known about it if I didn't upload it so ... er ..." Yeah, shut up! You saw somebody getting kicked in the balls and whipped out your phone just like the other drunken pedestrians in your video.
Anyway, if you were starting to worry about the people who actually had to sustain the ball kicking, they're alright.
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